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Drummer Jokes

Drummer Jokes

Yes we know they are out there, and rather than ignore them we thought we'd enjoy the fun.

If as a drummer you find these jokes offensive, try thinking singer or guitar player.

If you still find them offensive then yes, these jokes are about you. :)



Drummer Jokes Page 5
What does it mean when a drummer is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
What's the similarity between a drummer and a philosopher?
They both perceive time as an abstract concept.
How do you get a drummer to stop biting his nails?
Make him wear shoes.
What is the dynamic range of a drum set?
On and off.
Read more...
 
Drummer Jokes Page 4
Two drummers walk into a bar...
which is funny because you would have figured the second one would have seen the first guy
do it.
Why do drummers have one more brain cell than a horse?
So that when marching in a parade, they can avoid the horse droppings on the road.
Why are band intermissions limited to 20 minutes?
So you don't have to retrain the drummers.
One friend to another: "Why do you hang around with that drummer??"
"Beats me!"
How do you get a drummer to play an accelerando?
Ask him to play in 4/4 at a steady 120 bpm.
Read more...
 
Drummer Jokes Page 3
Why are drummers always losing their watches?
Everyone knows they have trouble keeping time.
What do you call 10 drummers in a drum circle?
A dope ring.
What is the difference between a drummer and a savings bond?
One will mature and make money.
What do you call a beautiful woman on a drummer's arm?
A tattoo.
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Drummer Jokes Page 2
"Hey buddy, how late does the band play?"
"Oh, about a half beat behind the drummer."
Why is a drum machine better than a drummer?
Because it can keep good time and won't steal your girlfriend.
What's the difference between a drum machine and a drummer?
You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once.
Why are bad drummers better than drum machines?
You don't have to plug 'em in to get something stiff, mechanical and uninspired.
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Drummer Jokes Page 1

OK, so we know that we as drummers are the butt of every other musician jokes (but then again so are bass players, guitarists and that most humourous of figures the lead singer. Chick singers aren't quite so bad :)

Q & A:
What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer.
What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool.
How can you tell when the stage riser is level?
The drool comes out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

Read more...
 
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